Taking on the Collective Pain of Women..and Being the Change

Taking on the Collective Pain of Women..and Being the Change

It has been a tough week for me as a man. Now before you say “poor you”, let me explain. I have a great job. As a somatic healer, and as a sexologist, My wife and I have the privilege of helping women break through old pains and abuses of trauma and relationship baggage so they can live wild and free. I have always enjoyed this work because I see what comes out the other side once women get a chance to let it all out. And that usually includes letting the rage out against men. In our sessions, I actually become every man.  Especially every man that has hurt her. Uncles who abused, men who raped, boyfriends and husbands who abandoned, dad who was never there. By stepping into these roles and giving her the safe space to say what was never said, to rage against to the masculine, to finally let it out, often for the very first time, women are able to clear this old stuck energy out of the body so they no longer carry the often subconscious anger and sadness against men. And they have a lot of it. And men, working with this every day, it is no wonder they don’t exactly like us. So I am sorta used to that. But this week was a little different. On Tuesday evening, Heike had 25 women for her weekly feminine empowerment class which,for the first time, I got to be part of. And again, I was collectively the “bad” man (the Shadow Masculine), as well as the “good” man (the Divine Masculine). At this...
Embracing the Masculine

Embracing the Masculine

It does not matter if you are a man or a woman, it is time to embrace our masculine energy. And when I talk about the masculine I am referring to a particular aspect and that is sexuality. And actually, originally sexuality was in the hands of women, but right now men are carrying the lead, and have been doing so for the longest time. Women have been molested, attacked, raped, used, and overpowered by men through sex. Men have been known for the beings that only want sex, think about sex, and do whatever it takes to get it. The most interesting part in this is that by nature women are the sexual beings. They are the masters of using this energy for creation, pro-creation, and manifestation. Yet, women have stepped away from their sexual power due to shame and attacks of the past and men have taken over that role, not guiding nor using it for the benefit and goodness of all. Until women claim their sexuality men need to continue to hold the reins to make it happen, to keep this energy of creation alive cause someone has to do it. What we see today in this world is that basically none of us, nor women nor men have picked up sexuality in a mature, sovereign way and the question comes up who is running the show? We can call it the shadow masculine, the shadow feminine, the dark forces, or call it whatever you like because it does not really matter WHO is using and guiding our sexuality. The only thing that matters is that...
My Journey From Almost Dead to Sexy, Vibrant, and Alive

My Journey From Almost Dead to Sexy, Vibrant, and Alive

I used to think that I had great sex. I used to think that what I was getting was “normal,” good, above average, and fulfilling. Growing up in Europe I also felt fortunate to not have much of body shame and felt quite liberal when it came to my sexual freedom and expression… You see, you only know what you know and you don’t know what you don’t know. You think you have a great sex life and then… you wake up. Yup, that is what happened to me at the tender age of 45! I just got out of my second marriage and in those 6 years I experienced anything what love is NOT and what happens when sex went all wrong. When I met my ex husband sex was great, actually amazing, and then the most toxic enemy of love and relationship started creeping in: JEALOUSY. I thought I could fix it, I thought I could prove that there is no reason to be jealous because I was true to him, I thought that if I give more, show more, follow his needs he would relax and not be upset for every man that I would only talk with. I learned how to live my life as to not give him reasons for jealousy. I stopped working with male clients, I stopped dressing sexy, I stopped a lot of things that were dear to my heart for the sake of “love” and his comfort. The result: I was walking on egg shells, I was not myself anymore but a woman that would make him feel safe, constantly...
Real People

Real People

We just came back from our two week honeymoon trip to Costa Rica! So much became clear and obvious to me. About myself, about people, about cultures, about this planet… You know, it’s when you go travel to a different country and experience a different culture, step out of your daily routine – and then you get back to the US you can really see, feel, and experience your home and personal world all anew. And I did. Boy, I did! I went shopping yesterday. Yes, the mall of all places to start dipping my toes back into the American lifestyle. And on top of that during the month of Christmas – which can be a whole other blog. But back to my point: I was shocked! Culture shocked, shocked to the depths of my core being after returning from a third world country like Costa Rica. It took me a while to adjust, well, I am not sure if I actually was able to adjust. Looking around in the mall I felt like I just entered a world of ROBOTS! Everything seemed to be running on autopilot. Everyone seemed to just go through the motions of walking, looking, selecting, purchasing, selling, greeting, and then walking some more… I did not see smiles, joy, happiness, laughter, or any other lively emotions (excepts some complaining customers and screaming babies). All I saw was a dull world, a mechanical, programmed world. Needless to say that I couldn’t feel any connection nor was I able to really connect with anyone there. If I was lucky the cashier would give me the gift...
Take Your Spiritual Practice to the Next Level!

Take Your Spiritual Practice to the Next Level!

  Do you remember when you first woke up? You woke up to the world of spirituality and personal growth. All of a sudden you realized that there is so much more to life than what you thought it was… And you started your conscious journey of self discovery. You read books, attended workshops, took classes, maybe had a mentor, a coach, a healer, a teacher and it sucked you in. Curiosity, experiences, realizations, lots of pondering, practice, studying, conversations, retreats – you have done them all and you couldn’t get enough and you might still be on this path. You went to see healers, shamans, practitioners to clear your blocks, your past trauma, your current dis-ease and discomfort. And many of you have even gotten past this lifetime into past lives to clean up.  And you were looking for likeminded people, you know, the ones that seemed crazy, odd, different, woo woo, awakened – because suddenly you couldn’t talk to the “normal” people anymore, to the ones that were still asleep, the ones that thought you went gaga. You were tired and not interested anymore in having shallow conversations, superficial, unauthentic, uninspiring. Can you relate? Where are you today in your journey of self discovery? Are you feeling pretty good? Have you come a long ways? And, maybe like me, just when you think you have it all down, you have it all figured out, you have come to a place of joy, bliss, ease – it hits you again – and you feel like you know nothing, you will never be free, never get there, never quite...
SEXUALITY DIVIDES US RATHER THAN UNITES US – RETURN TO THE GARDEN OF EDEN

SEXUALITY DIVIDES US RATHER THAN UNITES US – RETURN TO THE GARDEN OF EDEN

How do you drive a huge wedge between men and women and their powerful connection, magic, and love? You totally confuse people around their Life Force Energy – their Sexuality! And since women are the ones who give birth (to everything) you focus on them first. How do you take the power away, suck the life out of women? You shame their bodies, you create the sense of competition, you make them feel like they are never going to be perfect and you keep them busy trying to fit into some unachievable, illusional image so they will be busy for the rest of their lives trying to achieve the impossible. And after attacking their bodies you shame them for their free expression of their sexuality. You make them feel uncomfortable by telling them to hide their breasts and genitals, and you create shame around their “lady parts”. Then you address MEN and attack their sexuality. Since women are already in their shame they can now put their shame on men. That’s an easy task. Women’s pain and suppression of their own sexuality will attack men to feel the same. So the very main thing of how men and women connect with is now full of confusion, shame and trauma. The beauty and sacredness of sexuality has now become the most hidden, “unnatural” thing and lures in the darkness. Sex is only happening behind closed doors, under the covers, and GOD forbid, not talked about. It has become a “side product”, full of shame and confusion. Women AND men are traumatized when it comes to sex! And every once in a...